Since I first began writing this column a year ago, many people have asked for advice in the sack. They want to know what they can do to make the experience more pleasurable for their partner. Are there certain activities they should do to enhance the act? What about music? All of these questions will be answered here. This is your guide to sexual bliss.
Now, I must admit that I did not know all of this before I started writing this column. I had to do my research, and I tell you, there is plenty of advice available online. Amongst all the information I found, the most interesting is that the average male orgasms in two minutes or less after entering a woman (Kinsey Institute Report, 1998). Women, on the other hand, are in need of at least eight minutes of action before they are able to orgasm. For most, the minute usage is even higher. Both men and women enjoy sexual acts, and rightfully so. Let's see what we can learn to help all of us let out our steam.
Let's first begin with activities that can be conducted in the privacy of your own home. According to healthdiscovery.com, the muscles in your genital areas (pubococcygeal) can be conditioned to improve the pleasure ring simply by flexing and loosening them. Sit up straight in your seat and practice tightening and loosening your genital muscles. Hold for five seconds, and then loosen. Do this for 15 minutes each day. (If you can't find this muscle try this: The next time you have to urinate, stop in the process. Your pubococcygeal muscle is the same muscle that helps your urinate).
It will take three to four weeks to notice results, but healthdiscovery.com guarantees it will work. You will have greater strength and arousal. If you want to switch things up, try flexing these muscles during sex. As a side note, just before a man finishes, if he holds these muscles tight as long as he can it will make for a more intense "oh yeah." It may take some practice, but I believe that the efforts will be worthwhile.
Let's move on to music. There's nothing like getting down and dirty with music. Contrary to public opinion, certain tunes should be avoided. According to AskMen.com, music to avoid includes Michael Bolton, Marvin Gaye and Barry White. Although they are targeted to lovers, they are boring, dull and should be used for nights when you are sitting at home alone contemplating your lack of love.
As this site says, these "songs can be compared to good wine: It tastes great, but too much of it can make you drowsy." While in the moment, stick to beats that will make you bump. Any trance or electronic music will do, but feel free to explore. For my personal choices I enjoy simply anything with a hopping beat.
Or, if you are feeling adventurous, try tantra. According to Tantra.com, it's a "complex marriage of yoga, meditation, ritual, and intercourse that originated in India in 3000 B.C." By practicing breathing, couples can learn how to create multiple "oh yeahs," by moving their energy through channels in their body. This creates a "sensation of oneness and ecstasy." Those who have tried it report that instead of 10-minute sessions, the hyperbola of their lovemaking lasts from one to two hours.
So how is it done?
Simply put, it takes a lot of practice and effort, but the results are amazing. Check out these recommended videos: "Fire on the Mountain" (Joseph Kramer Productions) and Playboy's "Making Love Series: Tantric Lovemaking" (Playboy Entertainment Group).
No matter how you cut it, sexual relationships with another human being can be both exhilarating and scary. Learn to understand yourself: What you like, what you don't like, and what you'd like to try. Maybe this includes trying to give yourself the best "oh yeah" of your life. Be sure to always converse with your partner; keep the communication lines flowing. Practice these steps and learn how to create experiences that will keep your creative juices flowing for years to come.
