If you can't talk honestly with your partner about protection, are you mature enough to be having sex?
Communication is key in the decision to use condoms. For every type of sex. Every time.
I'm not advocating promiscuity; I'm advocating practicality. STDs are the new bubonic plague of the "single and searching" crowd, and no broke college student can afford a child support check every month.
I was known last year for my motto "Some people carry Kleenex because they're practical, I carry condoms because they're optimistic."
However, a recent study sponsored by Trojan condoms found that single ladies cite tampons (47 percent), lipstick (36 percent) and mirrors (22 percent) as essential, but only 9 percent of women think condoms are as important. Really ladies, what else fits into those ridiculously small pockets in purses?
Even more sickening, only 15 percent of students ages 18-24 always use condoms when they have sex, according to the Smarter Sex Survey. And in casually talking to some of the other clinicians at AU's Student Health Center, I asked them how many AU students use condoms and they all said, "Not enough."
There is no good reason for that, especially considering that less than half of students in that age group have never been tested for STDs, even though 11 million new STD infections are diagnosed in people under 25 in the United States every year, according to the Smarter Sex Survey and the Gamma Sexual Health fact sheet. Also, did you realize that even though oral sex is considered "safer," eight STDs, including HIV, can be transmitted through unprotected oral sex?
With that ominous information, why don't more of us use condoms?
1. People are embarrassed to buy condoms.
There's no shame in being proactive and buying condoms. If you're bashful, buy them online. Try the Trojan and Durex Web sites.
I usually buy in person. Confidently place your condoms on the counter and pleasantly greet the clerk. No one passes judgment on someone who is self-assured.
Another great place to get condoms: the Student Health Center!
"We make them available to prevent further illnesses," said Dan Bruey, the new director of the Student Health Center.
Look for free three-packs of Lifestyles (I've found them to be high-quality and high-sensation) in either the reception area or the bathrooms.
The Naked Truth, a club linked to the health center, hosts "Sex, Milk and Cookies" and "The Sex Talk" floor events, at which they distribute free condoms. TNT also sells novelty condoms on the Quad at least once per month.
2. Girls feel like carrying condoms makes them seem "easy."
As college dating scene players, guys and girls alike should have protection ready at a moment's notice. There's no shame in being ready to romp when you meet a fellow horny hottie.
"Condoms should be standard fare," said Planned Parenthood clinician Linda Duquette-Peterson.
Sexual situations should always involve the question, "Where's your condom?" she said. Or I'd prefer, "Here's your condom."
3. "They don't fit" and "Sex doesn't feel good" are not excuses for not using a condom.
Guys, if you're really that cocky, they have magnum sizes to further boost your egos. Ladies, if you ever meet a guy who says he's too big, run for your lives. He's conceited and will never pay you the attention you deserve between the sheets.
I'm a fan of shopping around for the brand and variety that's right for you and your partner. Lifestyles makes a great "wetter is better" extra-lubricated variety; Durex "Her Pleasure" is another of my personal favorites. There's a type to maximize every couple's pleasure.
For oral sex, I love Lifestyles flavors. While this conflicts with the eternal spit-versus-swallow debate, you're better off playing it safe if you don't know the guy. (Remember dental dams too!) There's nothing like a playful "What's your flavor?" to start a conversation about protection.
On a more serious note, your conversation with your partner should include talking about STD testing. Planned Parenthood in Northeast has a free teen clinic. The Student Health Center also offers confidential STD and HIV testing. Both clinics offer counseling about other forms of birth control. You can also go to the Whitman Walker Clinic near U Street-Cardozo.
Wherever you go, communication is key and sets the tone of your visit. Some places to start researching issues of concern to you are www.goaskalice.columbia.edu and www.bacchusgamma.org, both of which are college-student oriented.
"It's always wise to respect yourself and protect yourself," said Kathy Haldeman, Student Health Center health educator.
Bottom line: Condoms are inexpensive. Use one every time for every type of sex. STDs don't discriminate based on gender or sexual orientation.
Play it smart and keep playing the field.
sex@theeagleonline.com
