Every city has its own personality, and along with that personality comes a specialized set of Do's and Don'ts. D.C. is no different, except district faux pas could potentially jeopardize national security (not really). Enjoy your new home and avoid making strangers hate you by familiarizing yourself with the following.
Bragging that you work on "The Hill"
The Hill? Which hill? D.C. is filled with interns, and everyone knows someone who works on Capitol Hill. Unless "The Hill" you work on is the highest geographical point in D.C. -- Tenleytown (meaning at Steak and Egg scoring your friends free home fries) don't try to impress anyone with Capitol Hill namedropping.
Calling Pentagon City, Montgomery Mall or any other shopping center "The Mall"
When Avril Lavigne said, "Let's hit the mall!" in "Sk8r Boi" she meant the kind of mall that has a Hot Topic and a Mrs. Field's. Unlike Avril, we've graduated high school. Welcome to Washington, D.C. Here, when we say "The Mall," we mean that grassy expanse betwixt the Capitol Building and the Washington Monument. If you ask your friends to meet you at "the mall," and they don't show up at the J. Crew you've been staking out for the past two hours, that's because they're soaking up Smithsonian smarts and dodging tourists on The National Mall.
Standing to the left
Standing on the left side of a D.C. Metro escalator -- or any D.C. escalator, for that matter -- is the equivalent of stopping a car on the far left lane of a busy highway. Dangerous, right? Well, this pretty is dangerous too.
As a student, public transportation is likely to become your new best friend, so learn this now and don't forget it: When taking the escalator up, down or really anywhere, be sure to stand to the right and walk on the left. Besides potentially inciting violence from your fellow escalator patrons, standing to the left is the D.C. equivalent of putting on a fanny pack, name tag and FBI visor -- stamping "tourist" on your soon to be foot-trafficked face.
Taking dates to the monuments
When scamming on how to take your significant other on the cheapest date in history, please do not resort to the monuments at night. They're beautiful, yes. They're tranquil, yes. The city might even be romantic when the sun goes down and the tourists filter home. This, however, does not make it okay for you to escort Mr. or Ms. Whoever to sights of somber remembrance to make out on the marble.
Dating your boss on the sly
This generally accepted and widely recognized faux pas becomes particularly woeful in our nation's capital. Considering AU's emphasis on flashy internships and alumni networking, your boss likely isn't the southwestern regional manager of Nobodycares, Inc. The ultimate example is Monica Lewinsky; don't let this year's example be you.
