It's 9:55 a.m. and that general education class you signed up for has just gotten underway. The professor speaks in monotone, pausing every now and then to wave his hand vaguely at the screen behind him. You're bored and could care less about what he's trying to teach. Here are 10 ways to make it through the class.
Doodle. Got a pen? Now is a good time to hone those amateur art skills. Decorate the handout, syllabus or notebook page; any piece of paper can work as your canvas. You might scrawl some squiggly lines, geometric shapes or popular sports team logos. If you've got a sense of humor, try writing your own stick figure comic strip. The possibilities are endless!
Schedule your day. What are your plans? You've hopefully got a life outside of this class, so plot out an hourly schedule for the rest of the day. Don't forget to leave enough time for homework, laundry and buying that sweet new CD. If you wrote one of these yesterday, get a good laugh by thinking about what you actually ended up doing.
Make a wish list. Are you materialistic? Make a list of things you either want to purchase or want someone else to get you for your birthday or the holidays. Then write down how much you think each will cost and the where, when and how of acquisition. Be sure to spend at least a few minutes dreaming about each desirable object so as to waste more class time.
Quote your fellow students. Got one of those kids in your class who's always volunteering ridiculously wrong or off-topic answers? Keep a log of all the outrageous things he or she says somewhere in your notebook. If the kid says something really juicy, try getting it published in the school newspaper.
Think about a crush. Obsessed with someone? Perpetuate the fixation by writing his or her initials in your notebook, strategizing for potential conversation and fantasizing about what a date might be like. If you've got a computer, study their profile on Facebook or MySpace for the fifth time this morning. Then write your muse a flirtatious e-mail. Resist the urge to press "Send."
Do homework for another professor. Enrolled in a more important class? Bring the textbook to class and get some reading done. Laptop owners might also try writing essays and/or dissertations while the professor is blabbing on about the 19th century coal crisis. A word of warning: Many consider doing homework to escape boredom a form of psychosis
E-mail or instant message friends. Got a notebook computer? Take advantage of your university's wireless technology and open up your e-mail program or AOL Instant Messenger; it's time to chat. Talking to people online is the 21st century equivalent of passing notes in class, only stealthier! Keep a Word document full of dummy notes open in case the professor asks what all the keyboard tapping is about.
Make wry comments to your neighbor. Is someone sitting next to you? Pretend you're a comedian and make some witty observations about what the professor is wearing, the intelligence of that annoying kid on the other side of the classroom, or how awkward it would be if either the kid or the professor overheard your clandestine whisperings. Those lacking in comedic ability might also try general complaining about the class, though this tends to irritate the recipient a lot faster.
Meditate. Don't feel like doing anything? Try spacing out. Clear your mind and focus on your breathing. The class will fly by and you'll look completely at peace with the world. Make sure to orient yourself toward the professor. He's less likely to call on the students who seem focused.
Sleep. Tired? While it can be difficult to pull off a successful nap without getting caught, it's also the quickest and most enjoyable way to get through a boring class. Sit toward the back of the class, preferably behind someone with above-average height. Don't forget to be awake for attendance.
