Relationships, medications bring up questions

I am a 34-year-old graduate student and have a similar problem to the man described as not being able to "finish" in a previous column.

Since college, I started suffering from anxiety, coming close to a panic attack or two, for which I started taking medication a few months ago. My doctor told me that I might experience sexual dysfunction if I go on the meds. Lucky me! I now last longer than ever, which made my ex-girlfriend very happy. But it started to bother her that we didn't cum together. I thought about going off the meds, but I was afraid that the stress of graduate work would overtake me. So what do I do - go off the meds and have a great sex life, or stay on the meds?

Depression Reducing Uncanny Groove for Getting Ejaculate Dispensed

Dear DRUGGED,

I'm sorry for condensing your question, but it was really long. In terms of an answer, I have a concrete and positive suggestion for you: Go see your doctor! I do not have a degree in pharmacology, medicine or anything else for that matter. However, your doctor, who warned you of the side effects initially, will be able to give you more specific information and help you work out a solution. Whether that means changing your dosage, the drugs or whatever, it's very likely this side effect is not something you are doomed to experience in order to stay mentally healthy. In fact, I looked up one of the drugs you were taking on WebMD and it said: "Tell your doctor immediately if any of these unlikely but serious side effects occur ... changes in sexual ability." So tell your doctor, already.

Dear Pierce,

I am a sophomore girl, and last year, one of my professors came on to me. What started as a normal office hours visit ended up in my professor asking me if I had a boyfriend, which I didn't. It was at this point that I realized he was interested in me. In subsequent office visits we talked more and then last spring went on our first date. Our relationship became more intimate as time went on. Over the summer I felt guilty about my actions but was unsure of my feelings for him. Now that school has started again, we have become more intimate and it feels wrong, but I am not sure how to end it or if I even want to end it. What should I do?

Closing in On Educational Disaster

Dear COED,

You're in a really tough spot. But you're brave enough to send me your question, so you're definitely brave enough to get through this. You said you're not sure if you want to end this relationship, but you also said it feels wrong. You have the right and the ability to leave any relationship that feels wrong. Maybe you don't want to leave him now. Maybe for now, everything is OK. But, should you decide that it's time to go, you can do it in the following way:

This guy might be a teacher, but it sounds like you can end it like a normal relationship. If you start to show you're less interested, it's quite likely he'll start losing interest, too. Little things like being slow to return phone calls, being inattentive and not being affectionate are all things you can do to send a message without hurting his feelings.

Now, maybe this is the case, or maybe it isn't, but if he threatens you in any way, you need to go to either the dean of his school or the dean of students for help. You may not feel like any of this is appropriate, but please familiarize yourself with the student handbook's policy on discrimination. Also, the counseling center would be nonjudgmental, confidential and more than willing to help you deal with this.