CIRQUE DU FREAK Grade: C+
There seems to be no end to the current vampire trend, regardless of whether it’s in book, movie or television form. The latest saga to be given the big screen treatment is Darren Shan’s popular young adult series, “Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant.” Featuring a protagonist with the same name as the author, Shan’s vampire story focuses on the beginning of teenage Darren Shan’s life as a bloodsucker.
Stepping in as the main character is relative newcomer Chris Massoglia, whose acting credits consist mostly of guest spots on television. His interpretation of Shan as a naïve young teen works in the beginning, but as the story progresses, his character fails to show much development.
Everything in Shan’s life seems to be planned out for him prior to becoming a vampire. He is a model student and the perfect son. As his parents like to remind him, his future will consist of college, a job and a family of his own. The only blemish in Shan’s otherwise perfect life is his trouble-making best friend, Steve (Josh Hutcherson).
This picturesque life is shaken one day when destiny drives down the road — literally. A flyer for the Cirque du Freak is dropped out of a mysterious car window whose license plate reads “Des-tiny.” The boys sneak out in the dead of the night to experience this one-of-a-kind freak show.
The main attraction at the Cirque is John C. Reilly’s 200-year-old vampire, Larten Crepsley, and his dancing pet spider, Madam Octa. In a hasty decision, Shan decides to satisfy his spider obsession and steals Octa. This action functions as the catalyst that sets the story in motion and eventually results in Shan giving up everything to become Crepsley’s assistant.
As the serious, yet dark-humored vampire, Reilly pulls off the undead character effortlessly. He proves he is a flexible actor who can camouflage himself in any role. However, it’s not his fault that Crepsley is one big mystery to the viewers. His sudden interest in Shan seems to be completely unfounded. There’s something about a war and a prophecy in a book, but none of this seems to make much sense. It’s possible the scriptwriters were trying to set up plot points for a potential sequel, but they should know better than to get so far ahead of themselves in such a fickle industry.
In Crepsley’s world, being a vampire includes possessing super-strong fingernails that can slice a tree and the special ability to “flit,” or in other terms, run extremely fast. Flitting resembles something out of a cartoon, similar to the blurred outlines of Shaggy and Scooby running from their latest monster encounter.
Naturally, there is also some blood sucking involved, but this breed of vampires does not have the intention to kill. Humans are only put to sleep while the vampire feasts on their blood.
Killing humans for blood is left up to the Vampaneze, the mortal enemy of the vampires. These Vampaneze are threatening war on the vampires. Power-hungry and desperate to become a bloodsucker himself, Steve is also lured to the dark side and becomes part of the Vampaneze ranks. He and Shan, now on opposite teams, make up the classic tale of good versus evil.
Not to be forgotten about, the Cirque du Freak is made up of an array of interesting characters that help bring a bit of life to this otherwise downer of a movie. There’s the peaceful and larger-than-life ringmaster of the Cirque, Mr. Tall, played by Ken Watanabe. Salma Hayek also lends her talent to the film as the occasionally-bearded lady whose facial hair only seems to grow when she’s horny. Jane Krakowski is severely under-used as a woman who can re-grow her limbs, and Patrick Fugit and Jessica Carlson are Evra the Snake Boy and Rebecca the Monkey Girl, respectively.
“Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant” has its good moments, but overall falls flat. The material becomes very dark and mature towards the end, to the point where it’s difficult to take Massoglia and Hutcherson seriously in their respective roles. No matter how slicked-back the stylists may choose to have Massoglia’s hair, he and Hutcherson still look as if they belong in a family-friendly ABC Family original movie.
You can reach this writer at thescene@theeagleonline.com.
