•The letter to the editor about fur is actually a joke. The fashion article in no way endorsed buying real fur vests. 1) Fur really expensive. College students are broke. Do the math. 2) If you're buying a vintage fur vest the animal was already dead. Throwing a fit and spouting off facts about animal abuse won't change that. Go find something to complain about that's actually real.
•Hapas hapas everywhere...oh how I love AU
•*clap clap*
•Your "Caution, Harry!" shirt made my day. Thanks random guy on campus!
•Limerick 3: In these rants I make my claim #lonely is my name I search for a love What I get is a shove For these posts are true gentleman's bane -L. Leprechaun #imtiredofhearingabouthowyoucantfindadate
•Ok, this poetry is getting out of hand. It takes up half of the ranting space, despite not being a rant. Could the Eagle either stop publishing it, or create an anonymous space like this to post poetry etc?
•@Roommate from the Pits of Hell ranter: Yeah you are not the only one... I fear I will have to lay down the law if such a trend continues with my roomie.
•Dear Roommate: You are a well-intentioned, nice person and I wish you all the best. Nevertheless I am not rooming with you next year.
•To Whom it May Concern: You need an alarm clock that works, not me to be your Mommy and Daddy who do it for you.
•I hate people who are insistent with terminology that doesn't work: FOR THE LAST TIME, EAST TIMOR WAS NOT A GENOCIDE.
•Lonely, straight guy (who loves things about international relations) cannot find a lady on what I have been told is quite a non-hetero campus, could've fooled me...
•AU blames mouse problem on students not reporting mice to 2-fix. I didn't even know you could do that! Thanks AU for blaming us yet again for a problem you can't fix.
•Dear girls who sit behind me in my Psych class: I sit in the front row because I have hearing problems, and our professor tends to mumble as it is. Therefore, I am BEGGING YOU, PLEASE DON'T TALK DURING LECTURES. I can't hear a damn thing when you do that.
•Stalin's daughter Svetlana died the other day, she did a lot to make sure people got insight into an otherwise very enigmatic and complex figure, rest in peace dear.
•I hate it when people invite themselves along and the prospect of telling such people that they can't come is so awkward nobody does it and the person comes along because nobody told them off.
•Why is it that my favorite class of all time always gets cancelled but the ones I hate never miss?
•Just because I am in the room does not mean I have extended you a full invitation to update me on every. single. thing. You. Are. Doing.
•Anders Breivik unfit for trial?! Rubbish, I say stand him up before a firing squad the way they did for Quisling!
•Arlington Cemetary and the Holocaust Museum and special places meant to commemorate the lost and to honor their memory, they are not the place for screaming, bratty kids whose parents are too careless to bother with them. Either get a sitter or don't go out to these places with kids!
•Also that kind of horror at the Holocaust Museum... Kids are innocent, they can learn about the Holocaust and other horrific things in time, but it isn't right to start them out so young with no time to see the wonder and curiosity of the world beforehand...
•I am the third most right-wing person on my floor... Something is the matter here, I have views that would make some conservatives have a heart attack.
•I love the state of Utah and its people, and if you don't like either of those make sure you actually VISIT Utah before you go about making assumptions about people you have never met in a state you have never been to.
•That poem was supremely awful. Do you not have friends who feel comfortable giving you their honest opinions? Or maybe they're just tip-toeing around your fragile feelings. By the way, my rant had more literary creativity than your pathetic poem.
•@Dear roommate, I never ever liked you. You're just a poopy head. p-o-o-p - that's what you are. and you play roller coaster tycoon, because you know you'll never be able to build them in real life. so there! pfft
•Did you try talking to him about hogging the fridge instead of writing a poem about it?
•On the Julius and Ethel Rosenberg Execution: A couple that spies together, fries together.
•Dear roommate, I'm sorry my hair scared you.
•Dear TIGI hairdresser, Yes, I want to keep my bangs. Keep your judginess to yourself. And no, I don't want to buy any of your hair products.
•Saw the new Muppet movie with my friends and family this weekend- one of the best decisions I've made tbh. It was amazing. HATERS TO THE LEFT.
•I'm over trying to save our friendship. It's too bad you're willing to sacrifice something that was once so great because you refuse to acknowledge that there's a problem.
•Dear poetry person: have you considered AmLit instead?
•@Dear creepy graduate student on shuttle: Oh my god, I know exactly who you're talking about! Why can't he try hitting on people his own age?
•All I want for Christmas is sleep.
•Hi, my name is _________ and I like a ginger.
•I don't know what play your practicing for in the hallways of Katzen this evening, theater kids, but it sounds AWFUL. I would say "get a real major," but that never solves anything.
•OH MY GAWD I have been in such a good frickin mood all semester! I'm not sure exactly why, but life is very good right now and I don't want it to end.
•There once was a spoiled brat Whoes actions made us ask WHAT!?
He couldnt find a girl His music made people want to hurl
And now he is forever alone
•OMG, a Rangos Rant made the print edition of the Eagle #'bouttime
•A certain Anderson Hall President was looking damn good today in his pink polo, but I'd rather he just wear his sexy Halloween costume again ;)
•Who's this chick ranting about the number...maybe you should just text him...
•if you're a senior in a sorority...you're kinda pathetic.
•I'm admittedly embarrassed that I have a crush on you. You're really obnoxious and a jerk, but you're just so attractive, and I can't stop myself from being interested.
•Got any Sodium jokes? Na.
•This whole "roommate week- my roommate is the best thing ever" post/status floating around facebook is mad awks. My roommate is a whiny, self-absorbed brat who spends all her time lecturing people on morality. Is there a viral status for that?
•I gave in and got a DMS account. I'm curious to see how this turns out.
•@You pay your friends Eaglebucks: You should invest some time in reading comprehension. "Friends AND places that accept Eaglebucks." Two completely unrelated things.
•The cookie jars at TDR seriously piss me off. It is now so much harder to get a freakin regular chocolate chip cookie, which are clearly in higher demand than all the other cookies, so freakin make more chocolate chip! And then don't mix them in with those deceitful raisin cookies.
•There was scrap metal in the shower this morning... Shower shoes anyone?
•I throw highlighters at my roommate because it's fun
•I,II,Brotherhood, REVELATIONS
•The one (finally) straight guy at AU that likes me, and he bores me to death. I must have really f*@#ed up in a past life to have this ray of hope taunt me.
•I love it when the front desk is playing Justin Bieber christmas music! -Belieber
•Where all the Nutella at?
•returning home to realize that you should have taken him up on his offer this summer to start a long distance relationship; now after seeing him again all i can think about is him
•If you really wish you could like me back, then at least tell me why you don't like me. I'd rather have that, and yet still be friends and be able to hang out, rather than wasting my time still chasing after you. I am trying to be as mature as possible with this, really. I know this all takes time, but we should be wise with our time because time is running out. It always is.
•The last time I saw someone lick their own boogers was in first grade... And it wasn't cool then, either. I cannot believe I've been sitting next to someone doing that for the past 2 hours in the library. Gonna vom.
•Can someone explain to me why I am paying thousands of dollars to read "scholarly articles" that go on and on about how there is not enough info to back the findings and the entire article has no validity? -Waste of time
•@All freshmen girls are not biddies: I think you meant "not all freshman girls are biddies."
•I really dislike my morning class. Finals week is coming up, and I don't think I can recall a single thing I learned in that class. Help?
•READ THE JFC RULES THAT ARE POSTED ON THE BOARD EVERY DAY. 30 MINUTE SLOTS. MUST BE ON MACHINE WITHIN 5 MINUTES OF SIGN UP TIME. THIS IS NOT ROCKET SCIENCE.
•The Eagle Rants Editor: not the heroine we deserved, but the heroine we needed
•But seriously, is there any guy out there who will be the Daniel Jackson to my Sha're?
•Dear roommate Y YOU EAT SO MUCH POPCORN?! You know who you are.....
•WHY AM I SO DUMB SOMETIMES!?
•You stay classy, TDR.
•Just because my high school teachers suck and I can't take a test I will not get any of the classes I need to take next semester. So sick of AP credits hanging over my head.
•That epic poem was epic!!!!!!!!!!!
•It's not about putting out - it's about putting in!
•Ughhhh I had forgotten how much I hate birds singing the morning after I pull an all-nighter. Go away! Stop mocking my slumberless state!
•Note to self: next time, drink decaf.
•I'm trying this psychological experiment where every time my neighbor bangs on the wall for me to be quite at 11:00AM I turn up the volume on whatever I'm doing. Hopefully it will condition her not to knock.
•Not a fan of the new TDR cookie jars. Now I have to look like a big idiot when I'm searching through the raisin cookies for the one chocolate chip one.
•Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail
Rant here!
