• I want to defend the wonk campaign just to spite the annoying haters.
• @"I see so many attractive guys in TDR and I always wonder how I could start a conversation without being sketchy." So is that some chamomile iced tea you spilled on your yoga pants or are you just happy to see me?
• @at what rate am I a slut? When you change your name to""Chastity"" and a mysterious tribal tattoo above your bum starts to appear, then you know you're a slut.
• @wanna be a troll when I grow up...I already AM one. Get on my level!
• @Nancy Pelosi chopping off d**ks. Not sure how legit your comparison is, but it's still brilliant. Keep being awesome.
• @"Open Mic Guy-Sorry I didn’t reply yesterday!" Do you wanna meet on the quad?
• @person asking what to do with money: if you think you will always be single, why not save the money and adopt a kid who you can provide a really awesome life for? that's what I would do anyway!
• "I drive on her streets 'cause she's my companion, I walk through her hills 'cause she knows who I am..."
• Why did the Eagle's Nest stop selling baked chips? They have so much less fat... :(
• if you ask if I want to have sex and I say no, it probably won't change for the next 18 times you ask. take a hint much!
• dear guy that thinks he can use me for a booty call: i think i have mono. i hope you have go through this sore throat fakery. peace and blessings!
• @fellow troll: Are you male or female? Gay or straight?
• @'No, your butt does NOT look good in legging pants. No one's does." FALSE
• It's getting to be Ugg season. Worst.
• I miss you so much and I know we don't talk as much as we used to. :/ Are things already going downhill? I thought this was going to be different.
• @guy who claims that Republicans want to control womens' wombs...you are unbelievably ignorant. Here is the irony of liberals: they want to tell YOU how to eat by imposing all sorts of nanny-state laws, but THEY can't be inconvenienced by having to, oh, I don't know, see the heartbeat of the baby they are about to kill. #doublestandard.
• Every time I see you I can't help but think about how amazing the sex was.
• There's nothing wrong with floorcest.
• Dear CAUS representative who accosted me on the quad last week. I love your curly brown hair and your dreamy eyes. You talked to me about tuition increases, now let me talk to you about love at first sight.
• "OK, SO, I NEED A CUDDLE BUDDY! YES, I WANT ONE THAT BADLY! PLEASE BE PERTY!" I want a cuddle buddy too :/
• In the words of the prophet Kayne, "Sunglasses and Advil, last night was mad real."
• Drunkopoly was a clutch decision last night ;)
• EMMYS TONIGHT ARE GOING TO BE INSANE! BREAKING BAD FOR ALL ITS NOMINATIONS, LET'S DO THIS
• @What can I buy to make me happy? : Treat a group of friends to dinner and drinks. Go out and hang out with people and enjoy yourself. There are lots of fun things to do in DC that cost money. Pay for said things and bring people along to do them with you.
• Stop acting like a bunch of high schoolers. Gossiping about this imagined drama doesn't help anyone.
• I am actually really really sad about the baby panda dying.
• I think FB chat is probably the biggest factor in my being pathetic, what with the amount of time I spend debating chatting you and not doing it. Or when I do it and get a one word answer. But you're so much friendlier in person. So much confusion!
• I am disgusted with the journalism and poor judgment of Eagle reporter Heather Mongilio and the editor Zach Cohen. This is a sad week for you and a sadder week for AU.
• @Using money, how can I best achieve happiness? - Buy me things and I'll make you happy. ;) ... or you could just buy a ton of ice cream.
• Anybody here who has played Munchkins before / would wanna meet up and play? maybe get chipotle or something after. I was introduced to it this Summer and thought it was awesome. Wanna get into it. :)
• @trust fund baby: Wow, really?!?!? You're complaining that you're grandparents were so loaded they could afford to give your family a massive amount of money? Boo hoo, it sure does suck to be you. The average person can't just go through life leeching off their family's hard earned money.
• Can we standardize the rants posting time to within like, 3 hours at least? It's really weird to have them up at 3 am one day and 3 pm the next...
• Wow, y'all are real pathetic and need somewhere healthy to vent your rants.
• "That's me, That's Me The boy with the broken halo That's me, That's me The devil won't let me be."
• Chill bluntz.
• "You've got what Adam craved when he With love for Eve was tortured She only had an apple tree But you, you've got an orchard."
• To be honest, I am so happy that I'm single while studying abroad. The distance sucked and quite frankly, we just weren't right for each other. The bad part is that I'm really sexually frustrated and my program is too small for me to comfortably hook up with someone I know. Time for a European hook up buddy? I think yes.
• To Fake Neil Kerwin, I have noticed you haven't tweeted in a while. Please start doing it again! That is all. -Beloved Tweet Reader
• @I need you to notice I’m not ok..... I'm noticing that you're not ok, I'm not ok either. Let's not be ok together.
• Dear Ranter, I appreciate the kind words, but what I would appreciate even more is you coming out to the CAUS meeting, or for pancakes tomorrow at 10pm. Tuition is going up and my good looks alone won't stop it. Sincerely, CAUS guy with arm tattoo
• I think my new flatmate must think I'm a total freaking slob. She spent five minutes this afternoon talking about how much she judges people who wear sweatpants and "the first thing they see in their closet" to class. She must judge me so freaking hard- I wear t-shirts, jeans/yoga pants almost every day. This may not end well.
• girlfriend imma a get all PBS up in yo s***
